M.B.

I have no idea what time it is right now. My watch was stolen literally within the first five minutes of my arrival in Mali. I was grabbing my bags from customs, looked down and my watch was nowhere to be found! All I really know now is the sun is setting off to my right over a peaceful little African village. Last night, we stayed in the capital city of Bamako but now we are officially in the heart of the bush.

The bush is actually a pretty unique beauty. Basically, its desert... ish. Everything here is just about dead. Its a bunch of trees with no leaves, dirt, and rocks. What little vegetation that is actually living looks like its on its last leg gasping for breath. However, despite all of this, there seems to be a certain beauty that seeps through the life that does exist here.

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This especially becomes true when the sun's rays hit just right, like now at sunset for instance. The earthy tones just seem to absorb the light taking on their own little violet luminescence. Its kind of tough to explain or even really capture in picture.

All throughout the prep for this trip I've felt tossed into the mix to basically learn as I go. This has made this first day in the bush a rather tough day. I really want to contribute to our conversations with villagers and teaching times, but I genuinely have no clue where to begin! (side note: the village mosque just sounded the evening call to prayer, I've never been around that before)

However, as we sat underneath the shade of our "hanger" (its basically a stick overhang thatched with straw). I began to sense God whispering to me, "Michael, just calm down. Its the first day, quit getting all worked up. Love these people. Be a missionary like you know you are supposed to. Tell them about me. Tell them about what I've done. Leave it at that, okay?" So, I'm doing my best to keep that mentality.

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Worship with the natives has been quite heart warming. Over the years, I've grown to love seeing different cultures express their praise and worship to God. I don't know why, but I think all the absence of the glitz and production that I'm so used to in the States makes their worship seem so much more authentic; it seems less of a gimmick and more of an honest expression towards Christ. However, there is one thing that I didn't expect. Maybe this is because I'm a white kid, but the African rhythm's seemed to counter actual rhythm. I couldn't help but think that my best friend Klash would have fit right in!

At the end of the night we taught about Jesus. I was nervous. But it went incredibly well despite that. We sat down and simply taught through the Gospel. Literally, it seemed just like Paul... and I thought that to be really strange, in a good way. I think this is what our future trips with Midtown will have to look forward to. Nonetheless, this interaction really helped ease the tension of being involved I had earlier. God, thanks for that blessing.

I might take a break from journaling for a few days in order to not give merely accounts of events but rather delve into what the Holy Spirit is actually teaching me.

P.S. Now, I'm lying under the African night sky and I may never have seen anything more magnificent.

day two: tired, slightly delirious, but well read

Feb 26, 2008
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Tuesday, February 12, 2008
2:45 PM (France-Time... whatever that is)

I'm all but finished with The Irresistible Revolution. It has really been an amazing read for me, especially, I believe, in prep for this trip. I see so much of the unknown groaing of my heart for a faith in Jesus that takes the red letters of the Bible seriously in its pages.

But the more excited and supportive of these ideas I get, one concern keeps pushing itself to the forefront of my heart and mind - am I more passionate about this Christian ethic or the One from whom the ethic has its purpose and meaning?

If I take Jesus out of the equation (correction: if Jesus Himself isn't the equation) and I'm just excited about a new way of living, then all I'm really pumped about is a sexy form or morality that I think would make me look cool and seem like I have it all together. And in reality, that would lack any real significance or transformational power.

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I've been traveling for a good number of hours now and, as I'm sure its easy to tell, I'm quite tired. I'm sitting in the Charles de Gaulle Airport in Paris right now and I'll admit that I'm fairly impressed with its design. However, I'm fairly unimpressed with the way its organized. Its the most difficult airport ever to get around in.

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The whole place is quite chic and modern... even the bathrooms! I wanted to take a picture of the ridiculously unique toilet fixtures but I felt too much like a creep taking a camera into the bathroom.

Nonetheless, the very little I've seen of France I like. I think it'd be a pretty decent place to come back and visit. I've been throwing around some ideas of doing a tour through Europe in a year or so, either alone, with my sister, or anyone else who is interested in going. France will probably be a stop along the journey.

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I'm still kind of anxious about getting to Mali. I'm feeling quite unready to minister to the people there. Traveling with groups and filing in and out of busy airports (not to mention the fatigue of flying for so many hours) leaves little room for time alone with God (which in my opinion is a necessity for a trip like this). Catch 22.

dad. and the simple way.

Feb 25, 2008
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Monday, February 11, 2008
1:00 PM

I haven't left GSP yet, but I have left my parents at the gate. I'll be honest, and maybe this shows my lack of preparation for this trip, but for me these flights to and from Africa are just another journey for me. They are special, yes, in their own sense, but part of the norm of who I am. I'm a traveler. God has made me that way.

As Mom, Dad, and I were approaching the gate all I was thinking was, "Well, here we go again, off to Africa this time," like it was no big deal. I was looking around the airport, people watching like normal, not really paying attention to my parents beside me. But when we got to the gate I looked up and was surprised by tears swelling in their eyes.

They've seen my travel several times, why the tears? Maybe it was the money (doubtful), maybe it was that their baby boy was about to travel the globe, maybe it was the reasons why he was traveling the globe, but for whatever reason it became clear to me that this trip meant more tot them than I had thought!

I wasn't terribly surprised to see my mom crying; she cries when I cross the street much less leave the country. I was, however, shocked to see my dad all choked up. My dad is usually a fairly stoic guy when it comes to crying. I never really see him do it. The only other time I can remember it happening was when my grandmother died. But here he was at Terminal B of GSP fighting back tears.

One of the things I have often struggled with is knowing my father's love for me. I've always known he loved me but growing up, especially in my teenage years when work dominated his life, I struggled to feel like he showed it. But these tears spoke volumes into my life and I could see beyond a shadow of a doubt that my dad does love me and is undeniably proud of me. I can't express what it feels like to know that.

After farewell hugs and "I love you's" I began thinking about the prodigal son story. I thought about how happy and proud that father was of his son despite his rebellious ways. I thought about the tears of love he undoubtedly shed when the son came home. I think these tears looked a lot like my own father's tears, full of happiness, joy, pride, disbelief, and love as he saw his boy who was once rebellious now remarkably changed by the One called Christ and traveling the globe to tell others about Him.

And with this small glimpse of my dad's love for me, I feel like I caught a glimpse of my Heavenly Father's love for us too... and honestly, thats slightly too much to bear!

5:00 PM
I'm reading Shane Claibourne's The Irresistable Revolution and its turning me on my head. I am captivated by the passion and commitment to following Jesus I see in these pages. For a while now I've been feeling a groaning inside me to live more like a real disciple. To further lay down my pursuits, my goals, my dreams, and recklessly follow the Jesus of Scripture. And I think the treatise that Shane lays out is an ample glance towards how this looks. I don't really know what has kept me from doing it before... perhaps the sheer cost of it, but I feel a need to start stepping up in this vicinity now.

the stuff from Africa

Feb 25, 2008
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So, today I'm going to start posting the stuff from my journal I kept on my recent venture to Mali, West Africa. I'm going to do my best to stay absolutely true to the stuff I wrote (God, help us haha). I will make some changes here and there for the sake of coherency.

And I'm not switching to wordpress to do this :)

and now... Africa

Feb 10, 2008
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In just under 14 hours I'm going to boarding a plane to begin a venture to Africa.

I cannot begin to describe my excitement. The feeling has been slow coming, but now that the day is all but upon me I can't think about anything else. But actually, the big thought that keeps pervading my mind is just how gracious God has been to me to allow me to experience all that I have in 22 years. I never expected to be this young and preparing to travel to Africa, to share the Gospel nonetheless, twice in one year.

While there is a lot of excitement, there are nerves too. I know I'm traveling to this portion of the world for a purpose and I want to be focused and prepared for that purpose. However, as the hour of departure creeps closer, the more unprepared I feel.

But, praise Christ, the work doesn't depend on me!

So here's my gameplan. Since I won't be able to blog my experiences while I'm there (no internet in the bush, duh) I'm going to try a little something new as an experiment. For better or for worse, I'm going to publish the journal I keep while there online.

I'll be honest when I say that there is no telling what I'll actually write. It may be good stuff, or it might be real crooked and wicked stuff from the still unhealed places of my soul. I don't know what will come out.

Nonetheless, it will be real. It will be authentic. It will be Africa.

Sounds like a good time :)

thank you vox.com

Feb 8, 2008
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I was really impressed when I watched this. Way to go vox.com for this little tidbit from YouTube.

Its been a while

Feb 2, 2008
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Its been a while.

I'm good at stating the obvious.

Over the past two months, I've sat down numerous times to write my thoughts, but every time I'd write, I'd find myself being very dissatisfied with the composition and delete the whole thing. If this ever wasn't the case, the whirlwind that is life in Columbia, SC was monopolizing my time. But now, for the first time in a long time, I've got plenty of time to write...

I've gone on vacation! And its so unbelievably amazing; I'd recommend it for everybody.

Going on vacation was sort of a spurt of the moment decision for me, but one that I needed to make. If I've said it once, I've said it a million times, there is something about traveling that is just good for my soul. Since sincerely accepting grace my senior year of high school, God has steadily shown me that new places and new experiences stir my affections for Him. Getting out of the familiar and into the unknown provide an exhilarating release and rejuvenation for my spirit. So, right now, I'm nestled away in a little fair trade coffee shop in a small mountain town of North Carolina where I've spent the better portion of my day doing the things I love: snowboarding, thinking, reading, and, albeit lamely, writing.

In reality, this vacation is more than a Chevy Chase film for me; its my sabbath. I'm right in the thick of the most intimidating 3 months of my life and in the wake of embarking on a two-week Gospel spreading stint in Africa, I genuinely realized the need to break and connect deeply with our Maker.

So what happens when you get alone? Jesus begins to show you the dirty places of your heart, the places He wants to cleanse, the places He wants to make right. But even though that can be terribly frustrating and discouraging, especially when you're that terribly prideful type of person who thinks they have it all together (cough me), these times are the best. Its just Jesus drawing us closer to Himself.

So for me...
there are relationships I need to mend
there are idols I need to give up
there is hypocrisy I need to repent
there is gratitude for grace I need to live in

- for brit & sean